Can't see the wood for the trees!

Photo: Sandra Brown

Sometimes it is difficult to see the wood for the trees. The last few months have been no exception. Everytime I near the end of an album my mindset goes into overdrive worrying about the 'details'. Making music is the easy part. Mixing it down, adding meta data and mastering to get it ready for manufacture seems to raise my stress levels considerably. Ironic really, when you consider I am making relaxation music and don't get me wrong, the album has some really nice relaxing music in it, but my recent stress has caused me to stop for a minute and review what is happening for me.

With that in mind, I packed up the motorhome and headed to the Jigarre Jammin' session - a weekend of fun and music and camping with like minded people. From the moment I arrived and set up I was made to feel welcome. I wasn't going to find any stress here! A lovely woman came straight over and announced that as soon as I was ready, I should get my instrument out and go find a group in the campground and get playing. My trusty mandolin hadn't had an outing for a while and with guitars and ukuleles in abundance, it seemed a good choice. I had forgotten how much fun jamming along to simple 3 or 4 chord songs could be. Everyone was smiling, many including myself didn't know the songs but best of all, everyone helped those who were having difficulty keeping up. I played most of the day and put my name down for the evening walkup concert. At this point I started to feel a little strange. As I performed I could see delight on the faces of the audience but I could see something else. It became apparent to me that I had become an intruder, albeit a welcome one :-).  Most performers at the walk up session had never been professionals. Someone called out (jokingly) "What are you doing here?" I had been 'found out'. These people couldn't understand why I would have wanted to be there and that amazed me and at the same time made me a little sad because all too often 'professional' musicians don't mix with those who just play for a bit of fun. In my humble opinion, they bloody well should! It is such a nice feeling to just be one of the gang with no expectation other than to have a good time. As I finished my performance, the applause was thunderous and I was...well...humbled, and everyone who got up and performed received fantastically enthusiast and encouraging applause. They were recognised for 'having a go'.  I look forward to going back and sharing some more time with those lovely people.

My plan was to then continue over the mountains and  travel for a few months, but with the album calling me and the beginnings of a nasty cold, I turned for home. After recovering and firing up the computer for some more recording, I have realised that I don't need to put time constraints and limits on myself to 'finish'. 

I was chatting to a good friend yesterday who is a painter, and she showed me photos of some of her older work that while originally considered completed, was now being revisited and details changed and added. That is exactly what is happening to my project. Tracks I thought completed are now calling to me to make some additions. One very welcome addition will be cello & violin on a track or two, provided by some very capable musicians from Mildura. I heard them rehearsing and quite frankly, was so humbled and blown away, I found myself mistly eyed. Wow! There was those smiles again! Here we had classical musicians who felt uncomfortable improvising, and they were adding the most glorious textures to my music. I'm so excited about recording them and I have decided the album will be 'born' when it is good and ready because right now, the process of revisiting the tracks is just too precious to miss.